Your boss tells you that you did a bad job. Your coworker criticizes you in front of your whole team. Ouch! It's not easy to take criticism, no matter who it comes from. But, it is easy to soften the blow when you offer criticism to someone in English. Merely by altering your wording and your attitude, you can help someone grow as opposed to making them feel defeated。

  你的老板說你的工作表現不好。你的同時在你的團隊面前批評你。噢，不管誰在批評，總是不容易接受的。但是，當你委婉使用英語來批評某人是較容易接受的。只需要改變一點點你說的話及態度，你能幫那些人成長而非是他們感到挫敗。

  Avoid direct accusations

  Phrases like "You're wrong!" and "Your presentation was terrible!" have no place in effective criticism. In fact, it's best to leave the word "you" out, if at all possible. Personal attacks make people feel defensive, and then they won't really listen to anything you have to say。

  避免正面指責

  一些表達的方式像是"You're wrong!"及"Your presentation was terrible!"皆不是有效的批評。事實上，如果可能的話，舍去“你”這個字。個人攻擊將使人們會使人自我防御，然后他們將不會聽進去你說的任何話。

  Soften with compliments

  Before starting with the criticism, warm the person up with compliments. If you are discussing their work, find several things you truly like about what they have done. For example, "I enjoyed your presentation today. You presented a lot of good and helpful information in it, and I can tell you put a lot of effort into it. I appreciate your hard work." This will lower their defenses and make them feel appreciated。

  說些和藹贊美的話

  在給予批評以前，先說一些贊美的話給對方暖身暖身。如果你正在探討他人的工作，找一些你真的喜歡他們所做過的事。例如："I enjoyed your presentation today. You presented a lot of good and helpful information in it, and I can tell you put a lot of effort into it. I appreciate your hard work."這將減少他們的防衛自己并讓他們有欣慰之意。

  Don't continue with "but"

  However, a short, vague compliment followed by “but” such as "It was a helpful talk, but you really need to improve your presentation skills" won’t do much to help the process. After you've shared your compliments, allow them time to be absorbed. Immediately following your compliment with a "but" will destroy all you've tried to accomplish by making your praise seem false and insincere。

  切勿使用'but'

  不管如何，由一些'but'的簡短模糊贊美，像是："It was a helpful talk, but you really need to improve your presentation skills."將對于事情不會有太大的幫助。在你已經分享你的贊美之后，允許他們有吸收它的時間。立刻接著馬上

  Advise with advice

  Remember that the goal of constructive criticism isn't to make the person feel terrible; it's to help them grow. Instead of directly accusing the person, try to get the message through to them in the form of light-hearted advice. Phrases like, "Next time you might want to ? or "I find it helpful to ? can take away the blame while still leaving an impact: "Next time you might want to give a little more attention to the audience. I find it helpful to look people in the eyes while I am speaking."

  給出建議

  記住：有建設性的建議的目標不是讓對方難受，而是幫助人成長。避免直接的指責他人，試著將訊息以輕松愉快的方式傳達給對方。表達方式像是："Next time you might want to "或"I find it helpful to "當仍然帶有沖擊性的時候可以沖淡指責意味："Next time you might want to give a little more attention to the audience. I find it helpful to look people in the eyes while I am speaking."

  Stay specific

  People can't change overnight, especially if they don't get detailed direction. Simply saying "you need to work on your presentation skills" won't help a soul! Be detailed in your advice, and don't overload anyone with criticism. Remember, you want them to keep trying and improving. Don't leave them feeling defeated!

  明確的表達

 人是無法一夜之間改變的，尤其當他們無法獲得詳細引導的時候。簡單地說："you need to work on your presentation skills"對于心靈將沒有幫助！將你的建議詳細些，不要給予負荷不了的批評。記得，你希望他們是不斷的嘗試及改進。不要使他們感到如此挫折！

本文選自《外研社》的博客

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